March 11, 2012

fighting for joy.

i'm just going to be real with you. lately, i've been struggling to find joy.

this past week i've come to realize how truly exhausted & overwhelmed i really am. in every sense of the word. physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually. in these past two years, it feels as if we have done not much else except to fight our way up this long, hard road.

we have been broken. faced death. known insecurity. felt defeated. suffered loss.

but in these past two years, we have persevered. we have been sustained. and we are better for it. and now we stand on the precipice of a new life. we are almost there.

my husband is home from what is hopefully the last surgery he'll have. he is healing. and he is improving. slowly, but he his improving.

my baby boy is healthy. he is one of the happiest little things i've ever met. and he is growing into a sweet, caring little man.

we are surrounded by people that love us. surrounded. there is hardly a day that goes by that one of us doesn't get a text, email or call from someone expressing that they love us and are praying. we have been shown much more love than we could have ever imagined was possible for one family to receive. 

and yet, here i sit. struggling to find joy.

when i stop & think about all of this. when i stop to breathe. to assess my surroundings. pray with my baby boy before he falls asleep. stare at my beloved resting next to me. i realize something.

that really, there's no reason for it. there is joy to be had. to be seen everywhere.

i will make it through. i will learn to look for the joy. and i will learn to see it.

"weeping may last for the night, but joy comes in the morning." - psalm 30:5


1 comment:

  1. Amen! We all face moments such as these, but it is important to recognize that we are truly blessed by God to have been given our husbands, our children and our faith. May this be a new beginning for your little family...


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