his first story.

the other day during nap time, i let coen stay up with me while i worked on a quick project for the dining room. as i started writing on the large piece of paper, coen asked if he could as well, with the same sort of marker i was using.

i almost said no, because of the extra fuss and mess. but thankfully, i said yes.
i'm learning how to say yes more, and lean into the mess and fuss.
because, goodness, how they bloom through it.

and so, he started "writing" a story. he asked once how to spell norah's name, and he wrote it himself, along with his own.

when he finished, he told me his story.

Once upon a time, there was a boy named Coen. 

And he had a sister named Norah. 

One day, Norah and Coen went on an adventure, 

looking for dragons dead and alive. 

The End.

watching his imagination develop and grow has been such a gift. 

i can't wait to hear more.

love.

the two year old & the fairy party.

on her birthday, i wrote these few words:

t w o. two years ago, we were welcoming her into the world. relieved and overwhelmed by the blessing of our sweet baby that was such a gift after loss. in these two years, she has stretched my heart wide open and made such an impact on our family. her brother adores her, her daddy is smitten with her crazy, and her mama is so proud and thankful. every day with this beauty and her crazy eyes is such a gift. we are humbled to be entrusted with such a precious little heart. here's to many more birthdays with this sweet girl of ours. // also? I'd say she had a good day.

there is so much more i could say about this girl. she has brought joy to our lives in countless ways, and we are constantly amazed at her little person.

of course, we had sushi for her birthday because it's her favorite.
over the weekend, we had a fairy party to celebrate.

because it wouldn't have been complete without a few fairy wings and a little bit of sparkle.

love (& pixie dust).

10.14.14

dear c and n--

life is going to be hard sometimes.

you've already experienced it in different ways--sickness and hardship and exhaustion has encountered our little family more than we would have liked. and still, as the years grow that you live this life on earth, more hard times will come.

but there is hope. 
because just as there is sweet in the hard, there is hope in the hopeless.
and there is grace for it all.

what i want most in the world for you is that as you grow, you grow in your love for--and faith in--God. that your hearts would always be tender towards his word and his grace and his redeeming love.

if i leave nothing else behind as my legacy for you, i hope that it is this--that you love well, that you live fully, and that you cling to the one that ransomed you, through all the things that come your way.

your hearts are large and your souls are sweet. both of you have such a joy and love within that radiates out and affects those around you in great ways. let these be what drive you in your efforts as you grow, and as your pursue the one that loves you perfectly.

you are precious to me.
you are precious to your father.
and you even more precious to the God that was kind enough to give you both to us.

dear ones, cling to one who gives us grace and redeems our souls to glory.
never lose hope.

love,
mama.

10.12.14

dear n--

you are such a gift.
the gift that came to us after the sorrow of loss--a promise of the faithfulness of God.

you bring us so much joy, every day.

watching you grow is a magical thing. you've fallen into a rhythm of living already, and your character is decided and formed and strong.

your little person is so full of life and love and glitter--
so much glitter.

i never knew someone so small could be so opinionated and sure of her what she likes (have i mentioned the glitter?). i love your feistiness and how ready you are to tackle the world and all it brings. i maybe do not love the fact that you refused to say mama until just a few weeks ago, but i admire your resolve. :)

despite your fiery independence, you are kind and sweet and you love to cuddle. and you love to give kisses to all your favorites. a lot of kisses. you love deeply and fully and are so aware of those around you.

_____

i hope you never lose that spirit and determination and the comfort you have in your own skin. these things make you so unique, and a joy to be around. there will be times ahead when there will be those that come try to push you down or take away the spark that makes you thrive. don't ever let them.

because you are gorgeous, inside and out. 

you, my sweet girl, are a passionate force in my life and those around you. and i am honored to be a part of your story.

love,
mama.

10.5.14

 

dear c and n--

i miss you when you're gone.
even when you're gone for just a little bit.

i hope when you're grown it will be easier to give you enough space to let you live your lives in the way that God calls you to, even if it draws you far from where we are.

but there's not grace for that yet.
and so today, i miss you both.

your giggles.
your hugs.
and even the incessant questions (that's all you, c. :)).

it's so quiet here without you. and the quiet is just another reminder that you're not here with me. of the abundance of life that your little bodies leave in their wakes.

and so sometimes, when you're gone, the quiet isn't quiet at all. it's loud.
a reminder that there are parts of my heart absent from this place.

but reunions, they are always sweet.
and i hope, no matter where you go, they will always be.

love,
mama.

31 days of letters to my little loves.

lately, i've been working to be present in my day, to cherish the moments i have with these sweet blessings i've been given, while trying to pour as much love and encouragement and thoughts and life into each of them.  it has been a busy but sweet season of connecting with each of them, but it has left me feeling a little discouraged in a particular way.

there are so many times in the day that my heart bursts with things i want to tell them, but these long days of the little years leave my words meaningless to these little minds that can't yet grasp them. i have such a passion to be a champion to each of them, to build them up in order to set them loose on this world and make much of it. and i know that the season for that will come soon enough (and probably quicker than i want it), but i don't want to forget these years and the words that are for them, and have been for them in these little years, before it's here.

and there's the reality that i don't know how much of their lives i'll be here for--i have learned that there is no guarantee of decades of life lived together in this world. and so i don't want to waste the days (and the words) i've been given.

and so today, i am taking the first step to act on this passion that's been stirring. i want to leave them years of words and prayers and my heart written out upon pages for them, to have no matter where their lives take them.

i want them to know that i have loved them since the beginning, and i want them to see themselves the way i see them. beautiful, stunning, fierce, compassionate, strong, and lovely.

and so this is where i'm going to start. i'm joining up in the 31 day writing challenge, committing to write every day for the month of october. i'm sure many days will be not much more than snippets of our day, or prayers for their future, or maybe just a blubbering mess of a mama heart that overflows when i catch a glimpse of them. and there will probably be days that i miss, but this is my first step in doing something that's been on my heart for some time. something is so simple to execute but has been put on the back burner for other (and many times less important) things.

so, here goes nothing. :)

love.

p.s. if you're joining in on the 31 day challenge, i'd love to hear what you're writing on!

to find the rest of the posts in this series, click on the sidebar image.

around here, lately.

we celebrated our sweet boy who turned four with a chick-fil-a lunch date and a few small celebrations with friends and family. it was pretty low-key this year since life has been so buys, but it was filled with cars and planes and one very happy boy.

this boy of ours. he is so tall and filled to the brim with life. he can barely express all the emotion that  spill out of him at times and is so compassionate and sincere it makes us so proud. we are so thankful for him.

we've also been able to steal away for a few pool days and the kids love it. we all do.

also? this girl's got style all her own. ♥

love.

4.21.14

"She turned to the sunlight

And shook her yellow head, 

And whispered to her neighbor:

"Winter is dead."

- A.A. Milne

i've missed this blog. we've been living a full life the past couple of weeks and, now that spring finally seems to have sprung, i'm hoping for even more long days filled with new memories.

be back soon.

love.

12.3.13

“Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful.” 

― Norman Vincent Peale

it's official.
christmastime is here.

love.

11.21.13

“It was November--the month of crimson sunsets, parting birds, deep, sad hymns of the sea, passionate wind-songs in the pines. Anne roamed through the pineland alleys in the park and, as she said, let that great sweeping wind blow the fogs out of her soul.” 

― L.M. Montgomery, Anne of Green Gables

there is something about the crisp air and quickly approaching holidays and the promise of twinkling lights that allows you to breathe deep, exhaling the weight of so many things. 

the past few days, i've found myself in a struggle between being overwhelmed with stress and being overcome with thankfulness.

but i want this season of thankfulness to win.
and breed a life of thankfulness in this weary heart of mine.

and with these two, i have more than enough reason to be well on my way.

love.

on readjusting (yes, again).

“I learned this, at least, by my experiment: that if one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours.” 

― Henry David Thoreau, Walden: Or, Life in the Woods

things have been just a bit silent around here as we readjust to life once again.

nothing much has changed or anything, but i feel like it's something that needs to happen in our little house from time to time.

just a little step back to figure out where we are with everything, and how to live our days out well.

the kids are growing and changing and becoming more and more of their own little people by the day. we're praying over and considering what might be best for us in the ways of business ventures and collaboration in the search for that creative-work-life balance.
we're researching serious diet changes and the implications it will have (or not have) on our family and budget.

but really, we're just trying to live and breathe and push into each other. freshly aware of the quickness of the days and the short-lived moments of this life.

because i need to remember more often that this life is fresh, full of changes and failing and learning and growing.

it's been refreshing for me to start to realize and embrace the fact that i need these seasons of reorienting to pepper the rest of my days on a regular basis. to brainstorm and evaluate how our lives should look, how to best serve those around me, and how to love them all well.

as always, i am always open to suggestions. life as a mother of two little ones has thus far not often ceased to bring new challenges.
but these days, i'm starting to expect it, and become more expectant for the growth that follows.
and for the grace to get there.

love.

scenes from the (beach) weekend.

this weekend, we went to the beach.

the view from our balcony. it was gorgeous.

i'm sure for most of you, this doesn't sound like it deserves such a dramatic introduction. but oh, for us it does. this is the first real vacation we have ever taken as a family. and i don't mean as a family of four, i mean even as a family of three. sure, we've travelled some, mostly to see family out of state. but we have rarely gone to do fun things together, let alone take a whole, long weekend, to just enjoy each other. it's not that we didn't feel like it was important--it's just that the past few years have left us wanting for the time, resources, or energy to do it.

but finally, there we were. and while it wasn't the most relaxing beach vacation ever (such is life with a three year old and six month old), it was still a good time together and it was so refreshing to be away from everything, even if it was just for a little while.

we so needed it.

coen's first time seeing the ocean. he was so excited!

little miss just wanted to get into all the things.

she loved it.

spotted these two studs from our balcony.

she decided she needed some coffee, too.

definitely my child.

i swear he's happy. :)

best daddy ever.

headed down to the beach!

mommy even got some time alone. it was bliss.

my little lady. <3 

yes & amen.

now that we've experienced something of summer, i'm ready for fall (read: all the things pumpkin). but really, if i'm honest, i'm ready to go back. for just a little longer.

love.

norah :: six months.

yesterday, my favorite little lady turned six months old.

she is such a bright spot in our lives, and brings such joy every day. she is almost always in a good mood and will usually meet everyone with a smile big enough to make their day.

she is also determined. she's been sitting up for weeks and almost crawling for just as long. she will grunt her way across the floor, usually to get to a sippy cup her brother has left laying around. baby girl loves to eat.

her sweet disposition is infectious around here, and we are smitten.

i am so, so thankful to be her mother.

love.

(photos courtesy of photography by melissa joy--thanks aunt mimi!)